"You Americans are bunch of crazy cowboys"….

(corndog)

I'm an outlaw wanted dead or alive
there a reward bound and posted for my hide.
The bounty hunters know I'm worth my weight in gold
and that's more fucking gold than Fort Knox can hold,
but I'm slippery like the desert rattlesnake
and if you step to me you'll get venom in your face,
I've killed many a man in a Mexican stand off
I got quick hands from all the years of jerkin off.

(sled dog)
It's Sled Dog stepping into a saloon,
6-shooters on my hips & I'm looking for some womb,
I step to the bar, & order whiskey,
A girlie's on my tip & she's getting kind of frisky,
"Sled Dog, can I hold your gun?"
"Well that can be arranged but you've got to make me cum"
She took me by the hand out to the stable,
I'd never seen a girl so willing or able,
I did the deed; I'd gotten laid,
I tried to leave & she wanted to get paid
This pissed me off, I started seeing red.
So I pulled out my guns and I shot her in the head.
The gunshots rang out like a cowbell,
I stole a horse & I rode like hell,
Through the desert on a horse with no name,
So I named him Ed & now that's his name.
Ridein through a ghost town I saw Corndog
I road up to him and said whats up hog?
He handed me a bottle and said he was just fine
Sled dog with a gage Corndog with a 9.

(corndog)

When my horse died I was overcome with madness
I watched him drown in the Swamps of Sadness,
he was depressed he never got laid,
all the horses in the stable were female and he was gay.
I should of realized that he needed help
I should of got on all fours and let him fuck myself.
But now he's gone and to this day I cry
and on a quite night you can still here him cry.
The Last Cowboys

(sled dog)

This cowboy made his ole' ma cry when he lassoed and fucked a straight young guy.
(corndog)
This cowboy made the lady's weep when he rode off yonder with the flock of sheep.

I was up on my saddle, out herding cattle when the town bell ring out like a rattle.
I rode into town seems there was gonna be a lynchin
they were about to hang Sleddog for fucking the towns chickens.
I pulled out my 22 my mark must be true the bullet flied by and snapped the noose,
Sled fell to the ground and I came to his rescue
fat man on a horse bitch I'm coming through.
I pulled up Sled, said hold on tight,
we didn't stop ridding through most of the night.
Sled opened up his knapsack he was gonna thank me
that fucking ass was holding out on a ½ gallon of whiskey.

(sled dog)

We started to get drunk and Corn tried to fuck my butt, chill out fat fuck enough is enough
We polished off the bottle but Corn still wanted more he conned me into robbing the local liquor store
We got bottles of J.D. and tons of Mescal we got so much liquor it would kill a herd of cows.
The liquor flowed steady for 40 days and 40 nights before that time my asshole was tight.

(corn dog)

Fuck it man what the hell are you supposed to do
when your Americas Most Wanted you're always on the move.
I'm going delirious from all the lack of sleep
But I can't close my eyes I'll be dead if I blink.
The last cowboys